Who I Am, part 2

I fell asleep thinking how my post, Who I Am, is only half the story.  Yes, it's nice to tell what we used to do; what Lyme has stripped away.  It's even nicer to tell who we really are, our values and center.  But Lyme, believe it or not, has given me many things too.  This is Who I Am with Lyme and the things it has taught me.

(note: I use the term 'Lyme' as an umbrella term to encompass the entire entity of this disease - co-infections, MCS and all, not just B. Burgdorferi)

Perspective:  Lyme has given me perspective on what's important in life -- mainly my relationship with God, my family & my friends.  Everything else is just stuff.  I get hurt more easily if someone close to me does something offensive and I care less about what everybody else does.

Slowness:  Lyme has taught me to slow down.  I used to schedule every second of the day, from the time I got up to the time I went to sleep.  Walk, the dog, go to work, coffee with a friend, go for a bike ride, dinner, etc.  Now I try to do one thing per day.  If it doesn't get done, it can usually wait until the next day or the next week.  I enjoy the beautiful amaryllis flowers blooming on the kitchen counter every time I walk by.

Home:  Lyme has helped me enjoy being home.  Because going other places is such an energy draw and risk of chemical exposure, I have truly learned to enjoy being at home more.   I'm still not much for being alone & wish I'd have a few more visitors, but I do like my house.  Since I'm home so much I want things neat, tidy & pretty.  Nobody may see the boxes piled in the backyard leftover from Christmas, but they bother me b/c I want my house to be peaceful and serene - like a sanctuary where I can truly relax & enjoy life.

Family: I appreciate my extended family more.  When I first moved halfway across the country (and for the first 10 years) it was no big deal to hop on a plane and see my family.  Now that the plane ride and trip take such an energy toll and chemical exposure, I try to enjoy every minute with them!  I am also acutely aware of how awesome my immediate family is.  I have the best husband in the world, who loves me in sickness and in health, I have an adorable, intelligent 3 yr old who is curious & precocious.  Yeah, we have the same every day arguments as other families, but I try not to lose sight of the incredible gift they are.

So, I hope when you look at me you not only see the inside, but also the outside.  The outside who appreciates things in a whole new light and takes the good days when the roll around.